They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
