I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize