I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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