You don't have asthma, your pregnant
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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