My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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