Just mADE A PArabola og urine
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
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