so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
