i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
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She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
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