ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
