so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
you never un-have a 4some
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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