she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
