everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
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