I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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