I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
