dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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