I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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