Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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