My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
