Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
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I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
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So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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