Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
