There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Randomize
