I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Randomize