guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
