OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
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