talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
