Sponge bath it is.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
