please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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