I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
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