So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
