This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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