Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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