brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize