Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He kissed a someone with a penis
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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