dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
