Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Your penis caused this!
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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