Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
