just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I didn't notice because vodka
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
