I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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