i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
