Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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