no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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