Where are you?
In a non slutty way
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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