The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Randomize
