Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize