We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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