you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
