If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
