I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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