he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Randomize