Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
time to smoke my breakfast
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Randomize
