I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
